So far most of my stories have been about outrageous situations, and strange customers.
But sometimes the stories have nothing to do with the customers, and everything to so with the employees and managers with in the retail environment.
This was an experience a friend of mine had while at work on day.
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After clocking out for lunch one day, I was invited by one of my managers so come in to the office and have lunch and talk with him. It was his last day at our store. He was transferring to a different store, near by, but in another "district". So we were chatting eating our lunch in the managers office, when our district supervisor called.
Now, the policy with personal relationships between management and upper management, within the company, are that they are allowed, but not with in the same district. So if you were to start a relationship with someone within your district, one of you would be expected to transfer to another district.
Now this wasn't why he had decided to transfer. He was actually being promoted to a store manager. And the policy for being promoted to store manager, is that you can't be the store manager of a store you've worked in before.
So when the district supervisor called, he answered the phone by putting it on speaker. More so that he could hold his burrito with both hand while talking, than to share the the conversation with me.
But the first things that came out of the supervisors mouth when he answered were, "So now that you're moving to another district, that means we're at least not breaking that rule when we fuck in the back room".
To which my manager gave me a terrified looks, while simultaneously taking the call off speaker phone, and signaling me out of the office quickly.
Though he exchanged a few worried looks later, he never said anything more. I never mentioned to anyone within the store...
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Language Barriers
When ever you work with people, especially customer service jobs, you are always going to encounter language barriers of some sort or another. I've helped many people who have spoken very little, to no English, and even at times deaf customers. Sometimes it's a challenge, but it is one of those things that feels good and rewarding when you ARE able to make some sort of connection without the language.
Recently at work, I had a group of customers with which communication proved a challenge.
To which the mother flashes me yet another angry looks, looks at her daughter and says one last thing to her, before barking at me in English "NO! OKAY?!"
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Recently at work, I had a group of customers with which communication proved a challenge.
I was going about my "work tasks", when a young girl came out of an aisle very quickly. She looked me dead in the eye, and said something very fast. And as it turns out, in French.
Confused, and said "Sorry?"
To which she started talking even faster in french, while rubbing her hand over her face in embarrassment.
I asked if she needed help, or had a question.
At this point her mother walks up and starts talking quickly with the girl, entirely in french.
As I stand there awkwardly, I can tel by the tone of the conversation, that it quickly moves from quick words, to flashes of anger. With the mother looking at me between sentences with death stares. While the daughter looks like she's about to cry.
And I'm still standing there. With no idea whats going on, but feeling like it would be extremely rude to just turn and walk away.
Finally, with no other ideas on how to move on and away from the missed placed angry looks, I ask them one last time if they had any questions.
To which the mother flashes me yet another angry looks, looks at her daughter and says one last thing to her, before barking at me in English "NO! OKAY?!"
So I made my slightly awkward exit, continuing on with my work. Occasionally coming across the group while I worked, who looked at me suspiciously each time they passed.
Saturday, March 7, 2009
Pet Store Mayham
The fishy threat!
Pet stores carry a kind of goldfish, the Comet in this case, though better known to the public as feeder fish. The goldfish that can be won at a fair, and are expected to not make it through the night. The same fish used to feed reptiles. They cost less than a quarter, and are literally born and breed to die.
Now these fish can survive for years when properly taken care of, but that’s not the point of this particular story.
A fish, like all living things, needs oxygen to survive! So it should be no big surprise, that a fish, in a closed and sealed jar... with no air holes... will run out of oxygen and die.
Now the more fish you put in a jar with limited oxygen, the faster the oxygen runs out, and the quicker the fish die.
So one night this elderly women come in with her son. She's "from he old country" and speaks no English, so he middle aged son is doing all the translating. With them they have a large gallon jar, sealed, with 15 dead goldfish floating in it.
They explain that she's watching the fish while her nephew is out of town, and they just died! So after explaining the whole concept of oxygen and life, and that fish can't survive with out air, let alone that each fish should have 3 galleons of water each, let alone 15 fish in 1 gallon. Essentially... she killed the fish.
So they decided that they are going to buy 15 fish, hopefully 15 that look very similar, to replace them. Not that that's shady enough as it is, they still didn't seem to get, that they need a large tank... and that sure they can get those fish, but once they put then in that jar and seal it, or for that matter not seal it, it's too small, and the fish WILL DIE. So it's suggested that perhaps the best thing to do, would be to explain what happened to the nephew, and he can buy more fish when he has the proper tank set up.
They won't have this... they need these fish now, because the nephew can't know!
At this point a manager makes the decision to not sell them the fish. Seeing that any live animal should have a proper home, and there is no way these fish are going to survive, we can't sell any living animal, including $0.25 fish to imminent death.
At this point the son in furious. And he starts throwing out threats. The biggest being that he's going to sue the store for accusing his mother of being a murderer and refusing to sell them fish. In the end they got the fish (to avoid the pointless lawsuit).
They whole thing was ridiculous! And the store was almost sued for attempting to save the lives of fish (that, lets be honest, would have gotten eaten by a turtle rather than died in a jar if we hadn't sold them).
Those pour fish really have nothing to live for.
Pet stores carry a kind of goldfish, the Comet in this case, though better known to the public as feeder fish. The goldfish that can be won at a fair, and are expected to not make it through the night. The same fish used to feed reptiles. They cost less than a quarter, and are literally born and breed to die.
Now these fish can survive for years when properly taken care of, but that’s not the point of this particular story.
A fish, like all living things, needs oxygen to survive! So it should be no big surprise, that a fish, in a closed and sealed jar... with no air holes... will run out of oxygen and die.
Now the more fish you put in a jar with limited oxygen, the faster the oxygen runs out, and the quicker the fish die.
So one night this elderly women come in with her son. She's "from he old country" and speaks no English, so he middle aged son is doing all the translating. With them they have a large gallon jar, sealed, with 15 dead goldfish floating in it.
They explain that she's watching the fish while her nephew is out of town, and they just died! So after explaining the whole concept of oxygen and life, and that fish can't survive with out air, let alone that each fish should have 3 galleons of water each, let alone 15 fish in 1 gallon. Essentially... she killed the fish.
So they decided that they are going to buy 15 fish, hopefully 15 that look very similar, to replace them. Not that that's shady enough as it is, they still didn't seem to get, that they need a large tank... and that sure they can get those fish, but once they put then in that jar and seal it, or for that matter not seal it, it's too small, and the fish WILL DIE. So it's suggested that perhaps the best thing to do, would be to explain what happened to the nephew, and he can buy more fish when he has the proper tank set up.
They won't have this... they need these fish now, because the nephew can't know!
At this point a manager makes the decision to not sell them the fish. Seeing that any live animal should have a proper home, and there is no way these fish are going to survive, we can't sell any living animal, including $0.25 fish to imminent death.
At this point the son in furious. And he starts throwing out threats. The biggest being that he's going to sue the store for accusing his mother of being a murderer and refusing to sell them fish. In the end they got the fish (to avoid the pointless lawsuit).
They whole thing was ridiculous! And the store was almost sued for attempting to save the lives of fish (that, lets be honest, would have gotten eaten by a turtle rather than died in a jar if we hadn't sold them).
Those pour fish really have nothing to live for.
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Drugs, Cops and Bathrooms.... New Years Eve
I think one of the worst kinds of customers are the ones that come in right as the store is closing, and just won't leave, and to top it off reference the fact that they keeping you there. What is so important that you have to buy it right then, and not wait until the next day!And even more.... New Years Eve...why in the world would you want to spend New Years Eve shopping!? And though you may not have a life... the people working at the store are trying to get the hell out of there so that they CAN have a life!
This story isn't exactly about one of those particular customers... but it's the same idea of being stuck in the store until that last person who refuses to leave... leaves!
Stores close early on New Years Eve. Because lets be honest, there are so many better places to be. Out store was closing at 5 pm that night, and 10 minutes before closing man comes running in to the store. Running and screaming about the people that are chasing him and trying to kill him. His pupils were so large you could have swim in them. The guy runs in 2 full circles around the store, before running in to the bathroom and locking himself in.
After trying to cokes him out of the bathroom themselves, management decides to calls mall security, who show up and stare at the bathroom door before coming to the conclusion that they will do nothing. They figure, he’s in the bathroom, he can’t hurt anyone, wait tel he comes out, they can’t do anything. Big help that is. And to top it off they ignore pleas from the store manager to stay, seeing as they don’t know if he’s dangerous, or possibly has a weapon. Mall security ignores all of this and leaves.
That attempt having failed, so they called the police. After speaking with the police operator and assured someone was on the way they waited for over an hour. Realizing it was now past 6, and they should be home, but instead they are sitting around, pleading to a closed door, and the drugged up man inside to come out. We should be at home, celebrating new years eve.
Realizing that the police has no plan in coming anytime soon, they decided to try one other desperate attempt - to set of the alarm of the store - assuming that then, they police would have to show up to check on the situation. Turns out when the alarm goes off, the alarm company doesn’t call the police, they call the manager that lives closest to the store. Said manager, responded to the call with… “it must be a mistake, their still at the store, don’t inform the police”. So that didn't work ether.
Finally the police came and were able to get the man out of the bathroom and off the premises, but it was 2 hours after closing and 7 pm on New Years Eve. Though we did get out in time to celebrate, it was a long night.
-B
This story isn't exactly about one of those particular customers... but it's the same idea of being stuck in the store until that last person who refuses to leave... leaves!
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Stores close early on New Years Eve. Because lets be honest, there are so many better places to be. Out store was closing at 5 pm that night, and 10 minutes before closing man comes running in to the store. Running and screaming about the people that are chasing him and trying to kill him. His pupils were so large you could have swim in them. The guy runs in 2 full circles around the store, before running in to the bathroom and locking himself in.
After trying to cokes him out of the bathroom themselves, management decides to calls mall security, who show up and stare at the bathroom door before coming to the conclusion that they will do nothing. They figure, he’s in the bathroom, he can’t hurt anyone, wait tel he comes out, they can’t do anything. Big help that is. And to top it off they ignore pleas from the store manager to stay, seeing as they don’t know if he’s dangerous, or possibly has a weapon. Mall security ignores all of this and leaves.
That attempt having failed, so they called the police. After speaking with the police operator and assured someone was on the way they waited for over an hour. Realizing it was now past 6, and they should be home, but instead they are sitting around, pleading to a closed door, and the drugged up man inside to come out. We should be at home, celebrating new years eve.
Realizing that the police has no plan in coming anytime soon, they decided to try one other desperate attempt - to set of the alarm of the store - assuming that then, they police would have to show up to check on the situation. Turns out when the alarm goes off, the alarm company doesn’t call the police, they call the manager that lives closest to the store. Said manager, responded to the call with… “it must be a mistake, their still at the store, don’t inform the police”. So that didn't work ether.
Finally the police came and were able to get the man out of the bathroom and off the premises, but it was 2 hours after closing and 7 pm on New Years Eve. Though we did get out in time to celebrate, it was a long night.
-B
Friday, February 27, 2009
Today at work
There is a python lose in our store... no joke. It's on the smaller side... but still! THERE IS A PYTHON LOSE IN OUR STORE!!!
On another note...
Awkward conversation with co-worker
co-worker: OH MAN!
me: What?
cw: I just got a text from my boyfriend. He went to the doctor, but he's not insured. It cost him $200 and all he did was drop his pants and have the doctor say "Yeah we can remove that". Plus it's going to cost another $500 to get it removed
She never specified what it was... nor do I want to know. but ohhhh all the possibilities....
On another note...
Awkward conversation with co-worker
co-worker: OH MAN!
me: What?
cw: I just got a text from my boyfriend. He went to the doctor, but he's not insured. It cost him $200 and all he did was drop his pants and have the doctor say "Yeah we can remove that". Plus it's going to cost another $500 to get it removed
She never specified what it was... nor do I want to know. but ohhhh all the possibilities....
Monday, February 23, 2009
Spandex
This one is actually one of own.
At the over priced home decor store I worked at, there was a frequent shopper that always gave us a kick. She would come into the store 2-3 times a week and always in a different – brightly colored and most likely over priced- exercise attire. Always spandex, though not the cheap kind, this was serious spandex! And always, the top was the cut of a sports bra; perfect to show off her middle aged, over worked, overly tanned stomach, rock hard fake tits and her masculine arms. These were two-piece get ups, a matching top and bottom! And my favorite tops were the ones with the heavy duty zipper down the cleavage. (And I have to say, I am impressed, that for coming in as much as she did, I never saw her repeat an outfit.)
She would come in the store and shop, mostly just browsing, though upon occasion she would make a large purchase. For the most part, she would wonder the store and take advantage of every opportunity to work out. I always felt I was watching some strange exercise video about turning any situation and place in to a full blown gym work out. Ledges were suddenly aerobic steps, or my favorite used to do “the backward push up”.
And to top it all off, she would explain what she was doing to fellow shoppers, and go into detail about what muscles she was working out. It was like an exercise infomercial.
The first time I saw this women I thought it was a huge joke. Come to find out, she’s just really big on staying fit, and refuses to let anything - like shopping - get in the way!
There was one day she had been in the store and purchased a larger item. So she had come back later in the day to pick it up from out back – carry out - door. My manager had met her at the door, and taken her pick up slip, and then shut the door to proceed to get her item. Realizing she had given him the wrong slip, he opened the door to find her doing push up in the hall outside (mind you this city does have homeless people, who are known to relive themselves in said halls…so they were always a bit crusty and always reek of some form of human excrement). He attempted to get her attention, and was quickly hushed, so she can finish her 50 push-ups before stopping to retrieve the correct slip.
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At the over priced home decor store I worked at, there was a frequent shopper that always gave us a kick. She would come into the store 2-3 times a week and always in a different – brightly colored and most likely over priced- exercise attire. Always spandex, though not the cheap kind, this was serious spandex! And always, the top was the cut of a sports bra; perfect to show off her middle aged, over worked, overly tanned stomach, rock hard fake tits and her masculine arms. These were two-piece get ups, a matching top and bottom! And my favorite tops were the ones with the heavy duty zipper down the cleavage. (And I have to say, I am impressed, that for coming in as much as she did, I never saw her repeat an outfit.)
She would come in the store and shop, mostly just browsing, though upon occasion she would make a large purchase. For the most part, she would wonder the store and take advantage of every opportunity to work out. I always felt I was watching some strange exercise video about turning any situation and place in to a full blown gym work out. Ledges were suddenly aerobic steps, or my favorite used to do “the backward push up”.
And to top it all off, she would explain what she was doing to fellow shoppers, and go into detail about what muscles she was working out. It was like an exercise infomercial.
The first time I saw this women I thought it was a huge joke. Come to find out, she’s just really big on staying fit, and refuses to let anything - like shopping - get in the way!
There was one day she had been in the store and purchased a larger item. So she had come back later in the day to pick it up from out back – carry out - door. My manager had met her at the door, and taken her pick up slip, and then shut the door to proceed to get her item. Realizing she had given him the wrong slip, he opened the door to find her doing push up in the hall outside (mind you this city does have homeless people, who are known to relive themselves in said halls…so they were always a bit crusty and always reek of some form of human excrement). He attempted to get her attention, and was quickly hushed, so she can finish her 50 push-ups before stopping to retrieve the correct slip.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Top Heavy
Location: High end furniture store
Participants: Large chested store associate and middle aged man
The man came in interested in a dinning table. After showing him the different options for tables, we came to the last table. An extremely heavy hardwood table.
He stated reading the "Facts Sheet" attached to the table out loud. When he got to the the part which read "caution: top heavy", he looked up and said "Is this referring to the table or to you?"
Participants: Large chested store associate and middle aged man
The man came in interested in a dinning table. After showing him the different options for tables, we came to the last table. An extremely heavy hardwood table.
He stated reading the "Facts Sheet" attached to the table out loud. When he got to the the part which read "caution: top heavy", he looked up and said "Is this referring to the table or to you?"
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